the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts

From Ted’s Twitter, no idea where he got it from.

We, as a nation, have to ask ourselves “What the hell is going on?

Apparently this woman’s water has been contaminated with electromagnetic radiation.

Via Fark.

The Pastafarian belief of heaven stresses that it contains beer volcanoes and a stripper factory. Hell is similar, except that the beer is stale, and the strippers have VD.

From Flying_Spaghetti_Monster: Beliefs.

Goddard College invents Masters in Consciousness degree to study eastern religious traditions. Actual Buddhists, Hindus in China and India lift heads from engineering textbooks, smile, get back to work taking over world

From Fark.

I’ve only got one wrinkle, and I’m sitting on it.

From Quotations by Jeanne Calment, the human with the longest confirmed lifespan.

National park wardens to get arms in 2009

I also hear they’ll be given hands by 2012.

The story is interesting, but the real gold is in the Fark headline:

China surpasses the US as the world’s top carbon producer, making the problem real to conservatives and no longer interesting to liberals

Elmo, as in the Muppet.

Elmo is the only Muppet ever to testify before the U.S. Congress. At the request and with the assistance of Rep. Duke Cunningham, he testified before the House Appropriations Subcommittee on Labor, Health and Human Services and Education in April 2002, urging support for increased funding in music education.

I guess Cheney’s hand up Bush’s ass doesn’t qualify.

Indexed is a pretty self-explanatory blog, once you see it.

I like this one in particular, which Jessica Hagy did custom for Freakonomics Blog:

I once worked in a bank, making loans to small business start-ups. Our rule of thumb was that 90% of new businesses fail. The exceptions were franchisees and pizza places. But we saw no shortage of people willing to mortgage their homes to start their own sporting good stores and boutique dress shops, despite the 90% chance of failure. Without clueless optimists, the economy would grind to a halt. My own career has been a long string of failures and a few notable successes.

I understand the math of capitalism, and how the few successes are so large they pay for all the failures and then some. But at any given moment, the majority of resources in a capitalist system are being pushed over a cliff by morons. This fascinates me. And it’s clearly the reason that humans rule the earth. We found a system to harness the power of stupid.

From The Dilbert Blog